Page 12 of 24

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: June 22nd, 2020, 9:02 pm
by mad norm
I kicked a ball into the air and missedp

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: June 26th, 2020, 10:11 pm
by DeePeeNCAFC
Nope, I didn't get that last joke.

Try this one, and with apologies to Brendan in advance -

Covid-19 news from Ireland....Public swimming pools will reopen on the 4th July. Due to continuing social distancing rules, there will be no water in lanes
1,3 and 5.

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: June 29th, 2020, 12:17 am
by Stan A. Einstein
DeePeeNCAFC wrote:Nope, I didn't get that last joke.

Try this one, and with apologies to Brendan in advance -

Covid-19 news from Ireland....Public swimming pools will reopen on the 4th July. Due to continuing social distancing rules, there will be no water in lanes
1,3 and 5.
Nope, I didn't get that last joke.

Try this one.

Snake goes into school. Teacher says what is ten divided by two.

How would I know? Says the snake, I'm only an adder.

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:18 pm
by neilcork68
A bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a BACARDI and






























COKE.

The bartender looks at the bear and asks ''Why the big pause?''

The bear shrugs his shoulders and replys ''I dunno , I was born with them , I guess''

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:22 pm
by neilcork68
Did you hear the rumour about Butter being bad for you ???




Dont ask me , I am not going to spread it

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:23 pm
by neilcork68
Whats the most popular time to have a dental appointment ?????




Tooth hurt - y

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:28 pm
by neilcork68
What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common ???







the same middle name :wink:

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:30 pm
by neilcork68
What do you call BEARS with no ears ????????



B

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:34 pm
by neilcork68
A man asks his wife of thirty years .......''Darling , Am I the only ONE you have ever slept with ?????









Yes darling , the rest were at least 7 or 8 out of 10

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:35 pm
by neilcork68
What do TOFU and a VIBRATOR have in common ?????




They are both MEAT substitutes

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 9:35 pm
by neilcork68
What do you call an IT teacher who touches up his students?


A PDF file

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 9:38 pm
by neilcork68
I farted at work the other day… and my co-worker started trying to open the window.




It must have been a really bad one — we are in the Navy and work on a submarine.

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 9:41 pm
by neilcork68
Having sex in an elevator is wrong.




On so many levels.

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: August 12th, 2020, 6:06 pm
by DeePeeNCAFC
Keep them coming Neil. Keeping up forum users' spirits and bringing a smile to my face.

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

Posted: August 12th, 2020, 6:12 pm
by DeePeeNCAFC
Best mate just told me he failed his aboriginal music exam a few months ago.

I asked him, "Did you re-do it?"