Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.

Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.

"I bet you can't tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time," a husband says to his wife. She thinks about it for a moment and then responds, "Your penis is bigger than your brother's."

My grief counsellor died. He was so good, I don’t even care.

My girlfriend’s dog died, so I bought her another, identical one. She just screamed at me and said: “What am I meant to do with two dead dogs?!?”

Re: Can we have a jokes thread?

A woman was sitting in her kitchen drinking her coffee......
A few minutes past and she heard her front door bell ring....she got up and went to answer the door...
When she opened the door there was a strange man standing outside who spoke to her....." Do you have a vagina ?" disgust she slammed the door in his face..

This happened the next morning.......then the next morning and the next.

Feeling worried and scared by this she told her husband of her fears.....
" Don't worry Darling , I will have a day off work tomorrow and see if he turns up again and sort him out.....

Anyway , next morning they were both sitting at their kitchen table drinking coffee when there was a knock on the door..
" Don't worry love , go to the door and answer it , if it's the same guy and he asks you the same question say yes and I will know it's him and sort it out"

"Do you have a vagina ? " asks the visitor.

"Yes , I do have a vagina " she answers.

Just before her husband was about to confront the visitor at the door the visitor replied , " Well please tell your husband to use yours and leave my wife's alone."

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